The Challenges Of Zona – A Sexy, Violent, Romantic Fantasy Soap Opera

TETHIK: Well, at least he didn’t kill you, fellow. Dammit! Fool, I should have – (sees a note with the ring on top of it) “THANN: My Lord Tethik, Sorry to disappoint you, but now that Mommy’s not holding[…]↓ Read the rest of this entry...

TRANSCRIPT: As they retreat they hear “It’s fine. All fine. It’s just fine …” GUDIK: I have to say, stopping this war does seem like it was Divine Intervention. Maybe these two are a … portent. TORIAN: We can[…]↓ Read the rest of this entry...

TRANSCRIPT TETHIK: Rise up, scion of Holy Georg! Rise up! BEDIK: Mwah? Oh1 My lord! TETHIK: Yes. Go clean yourself and become useful. Unless I miss my guess both you and your lover here have duties this morning. BEDIK:[…]↓ Read the rest of this entry...

TRANSCRIPT TORIAN: Does dis one belong to you? GUDIK: Yes, and the other one is yours, Princip. TORIAN: Hmph! Do you t’ink dis bodes well or ill for our new pat’ togedder? TETHIK: I would say both, Princip. Last[…]↓ Read the rest of this entry...

TRANSCRIPT: EVERYONE: “Fight! Fight!” “Worm fuckers!” “Shit Stain!” “I’ll DO ye fer dat!” MERTEAN: Oy! You a’right? BEDIK: (grinning foolishly) Never better! MERTEAN: (brandishing a full jug of wine) Lookee wha’ I found rollin’ on de floor! I t’ought she[…]↓ Read the rest of this entry...

TRANSCRIPT: MERTEAN: A’righ’ … Roun’ T’ree … BEDIK: Round Three it is. MERTEAN: You go firs’. BEDIK: Iiii spy with my little eye … somethin’ beginnin’ with … THRASAN LOUT: Hey. Bedik! BEDIK: Yeah? Oh – yeah. I know you[…]↓ Read the rest of this entry...

TRANSCRIPT MERTEAN: All righ’. All righ’ Den … den I will kill a … a … BEDIK: A thousand? MERTEAN: Righ’ righ’. I will kill a t’ousan’ Urtts. BEDIK All by yourself, right? MERTEAN: Ah-huh! All by m’self![…]↓ Read the rest of this entry...

TRANSCRIPT: ZONN: I have always loved you. From the first time I saw you. All my life. You are … everything I have ever loved, everything I ever wanted. IPOLA:And everything that sticks in your throat … the “sand[…]↓ Read the rest of this entry...

IPOLA: And I am not pressuring you! The world is pressuring me! And the world isn’t going to leave you alone anymore. There’s not going to be peace for anyone at all if they have their way. One way or[…]↓ Read the rest of this entry...

Over the past year, my Patreon patrons have been generously giving me money to pursue my vision of an animated web series based on The Challenges Of Zona. In return they get early updates, desktops and other fun stuff. But[…]↓ Read the rest of this entry...

TRANSCRIPT: IPOLA: For anything else, for anyone else it wouldn’t be, Zonn, but this is you, this is me, this is for the world. Not an exaggeration! The world! It is that simple, dammit – I need to[…]↓ Read the rest of this entry...

TRANSCRIPT ZONA: When the time came, Kevin had me put my good foot in his hands and just “whoosh!” sent all three of us flying into the hole in the worlds! KID1: Wow! He must be strong! MENTL: Oh yeah.[…]↓ Read the rest of this entry...

TRANSCRIPT: IPOLA: I see. I feel foolish saying this but I really wasn’t expecting that. ZONN: How could you know what to expect? IPOLA: How indeed? For twenty-five years you’ve been thirty years old to me, and still[…]↓ Read the rest of this entry...

Just to give fair warning, this Saturday I am marrying my silver-bonded best friend and the love of my life. Because the business of a wedding and all that comes after takes precedence you all, Zona’s wonderful fans, may experience[…]↓ Read the rest of this entry...

TRANSCRIPT: IPOLA: He is a powerful enchanter – yes, we need him, too. And we need you. ZONN: What about my tribe, Ipola? IPOLA: Any warriors – every one of your warriors willing to fight. I need them. ZONN:[…]↓ Read the rest of this entry...

TRANSCRIPT: ZONN: Dragons … IPOLA: Yes. ZONN: Not even in my day … IPOLA: In no one’s day, Zonn. Not for three thousand years or more. But this is still our day. Our day didn’t end when we stopped being[…]↓ Read the rest of this entry...

TRANSCRIPT: EMANTAD: My name is Emantad, I’m a merchant. THRASAN: Why do you need to see the king, then? EMANTAD: My … my caravan was trying to avoid de war, and we went far nort’ and east into[…]↓ Read the rest of this entry...

TRANSCRIPT: DRACONIAN PRIEST: It do not change de lives we ha’ lost, de destruction and de treasure cost. GUDIK: Granted. We can discuss reparations, but now we need a principle to stop fighting each other and … […]↓ Read the rest of this entry...

TRANSCRIPT: THRASAN: Could use a stiff drink. Uh – maybe not you. DRACONIAN: What? THRASAN: I , uh … I hear you people don’t drink? DRACONIAN: Where d’ye get sich buggersense? THRASAN: What? What did you say? DRACONIAN: Kin ye[…]↓ Read the rest of this entry...

TRANSCRIPT: NARR: A new day. ZONN: Well, that’s impressive. Only you could have pulled it off. IPOLA: It was a group effort – and we had luck on our side. ZONN: The Draconians and the Thrasans marching together.[…]↓ Read the rest of this entry...

TRANSCRIPT: DELL: There’s the mercy for thieves and assassins on my land. MORCAI: Soooo – No questioning, yeh? DELL: You did well to spare one of them. But I already know where these two came from and who sent[…]↓ Read the rest of this entry...

TRANSCRIPT: MORCAI: You gels all right, yeh? Not hurt, are we? MAHD: Mahd and Feeby perfect now, Tom! FEEBY: Tom is clever and helps us! Mahd and Feeby love Tom! MORCAI: Ahh, my beauties! S’what I’m here for, yeh? LORD[…]↓ Read the rest of this entry...

TRANSCRIPT: ERLIK: Okay, fuck this – SFX: TOSS! SFX: CHNK ERLIK: AAH!! MORCAI: Ohhh dear-dear! Somebody took an arrow to the knee! Time for a career change, yeh? ERLIK: BASTARD! I’ll GUT YOU – SFX: SWIPE ERLIK: Wha – ?[…]↓ Read the rest of this entry...

TRANSCRIPT: ERLIK: AGH!! – What- MORCAI: Oh dear-dear-dear! Someone’s just got caught bein’ naughty, yeh? Looks like Teacher’s gonna have to spank you, yeh? ERLIK: Fuck you, creep! MORCAI: Language, Student! Ladies present, yeh? Heh! Well, one less than a[…]↓ Read the rest of this entry...

TRANSCRIPT: MAHD: FEEBY!! MAHD: Whoop!! FEEBY: Mahd, you okay? Hurt yourself? MAHD: It not bad. Just scrape a little. How you? FEEBY: Just feel dumb! Stupid pit trap. MAHD: It not one of ours! FEEBY: Tom making traps? MAHD:[…]↓ Read the rest of this entry...

TRANSCRIPTION: ZONN: Don’t be so hard on yourself. I was the one who hared off trying to be a hero. And we wound up 1500 miles from where we should have been behind the Urtt territories, and we really[…]↓ Read the rest of this entry...

TRANSCRIPT: DANCERS: AMANH HAIII ZONA: Come on – it’s second dance! MENTL: Right on. MENTL: Huh. ZONA: What? MENTL: Where’d your folks go? ZONA: Maybe they went to dance somewhere more private? CUT TO: ZONN’S BEDCHAMBER – ZONN[…]↓ Read the rest of this entry...