The Register

That's the equivalent of seven cartridges of coloured ink HP Inc has agreed to purchase Samsung's printer business for over $1bn, the largest print acquisition in its history.…

Electromagnetic fields aren't a miscreant's magic key, though Data from storage devices leaks through electromagnetic radiation to a much greater extent than previously thought, according to new research.…

Go on, who would you pick? With Hollywood types scratching their heads over who'll be the next James Bond, El Reg called on our finest asset - the beloved readers - to propose a successor to Daniel Craig, and you didn’t disappoint.…

What's going to happen with the CE mark for 'leccy goods? At about the time when my startup will be wanting to sell to the EU at scale, Brexit may make 80 per cent of that market harder (more expensive) to reach.…

Sarah Harrison on Ed's exile, Assange’s future – and the privacy fight ahead Interview Sarah Harrison, the British WikiLeaks journalist who successfully spirited Edward Snowden from Hong Kong to safe(ish) asylum in Russia, has told The Register how she did it – and what’s next for the NSA whistleblower, and for Julian Assange. She spoke to us a week before the Oliver Stone film Snowden is released*, although she hasn't actually seen the movie herself.…

Serious playtime for suits – but not you, gamers Review At $3,000 Microsoft’s Hololens isn’t going to be in too many gamers’ Christmas stockings this year, being more of a chance for corporates to work out the business case for augmented reality.…

Let it rain down from the cloud Ericsson said at IBC this week that it will partner Google to allow Android TV set tops to work with its MediaFirst TV Platform. It will also partner Intel to look for ways of bringing video processing more efficiently to the cloud.…

There's not much more than fine print between stress testing and DDoS-as-a-service Two Israeli men have been arrested for running a distributed-denial-of service-as-a-service site, after one seemingly claimed to attack the Pentagon.…

Redmond's Duckworth Lewis Method revamp rejected by the stats wonk who runs it Microsoft's attempt to re-write one of cricket's oddest rules has been rejected by its statistical guardian.…

Peek-a-boo to fans of Pikachu Hackers have breached some 670,000 Pokémon gamer accounts on popular fan site Pokebip.…

Your wish, dear reader, is our command. Including an Acorn BSOD. Yup, that Acorn Last week, we asked readers for Linux BSODs, and ever-resourceful, you've gone beyond the call of duty and provided oddities that reach beyond our expectations. Mark yourselves down as “KPI exceeded”.…

All attackers have to do is upload a file into a public folder. No password. No nothing Sophos researchers say they've uncovered a malware strain that targets Seagate's network-attached storage appliances and turns them into distribution points for cryptocurrency-mining malware.…

Leaker tells El Reg his dumps are justified because they trigger password resets Instant messaging platform QIP.ru has suffered the loss of approximately 33 million user records, which have emerged as cleartext.…

Mars' layered rocks look just like the American southwest, says Yanquiphile NASA Mars looks just like the American southwest, says NASA after landing images of some big buttes on Mars.…

Tamper-proofing and shielding against side attacks on the agenda The Payment Card Industry Security Standards Council (PCI Council) has floated a new standard it hopes will reduce credit card fraud that starts at the point of sale, in part by allowing easier upgrades.…

Robert Soderbery says he got a seven-year itch … just after a Borg re-org Cisco's senior veep for Enterprise Products and Solutions has left the company.…

Nowhere near as bad as its ten-day Christmas cracker, but something seems to be afoot Cloud hosting outfit Linode has again come under significant denial of service (DoS) attack.…

Workers furious that HR fell for phishing scam Seagate is trying to fight off a lawsuit filed by employees whose personal information was lost when the storage giant was hit with a phishing attack.…

Software update is 'voluntary' so long as you're OK with death General Motors (GM) says a software bug has left as many as 4.3 million of its cars and trucks with potentially defective airbags.…

If at first you don't succeed, your name is Tom Wheeler and I claim my £5 US comms watchdog the FCC has published its revised plans to kill the multi-billion-dollar cable box rip-off.…

Talk like a robot? I'm sorry Dave, I'm afraid I can do that Google has figured out how to use artificial intelligence to make robot sounds more human, according to a new paper.…

Psst, take a look at de emerald isle if you know what I mean It was US Senators that tipped off the European Commission to unusual accounting practices at Apple which lead to its €13bn ($14.5bn) back-tax penalty.…

Defensive attitude shows just how much social media giant needs to grow up Update There's a reason why we don't put kids in charge of anything important.…

Can't you see the conspiracy? Comment Following extensive coverage of Google’s capture of government policy making and its agencies, a Google-funded group has responded with a surreal report into “regulatory capture” – allegedly by people Google wishes weren’t there.…

It's just as weird as you'd imagine Uncompromising filmmaker Werner Herzog has made a documentary film about the internet.…

Did space rocks bring us life? Just 7 years and we'll know! NASA has successfully launched its first mission sending a spacecraft to an asteroid with the aim of returning samples of space rocks back to Earth.…

First they buy you. Then they cut you Dell is to trim the workforce following its $60bn-plus buy of storage titan EMC, with between 2,000 to 3,000 heads expected to roll. But if sales don’t track to management expectations, sources told us to expect more.…

Trolling or typo? Take a look-see Microsoft may have just confirmed a Surface Phone via a cryptic tweet. Laura Janet Baker appeared to confirm the long-rumoured flagship via a double negative. It could be the end of the silly season; judge for yourself.…

'Anomaly' wasn't rocket engine's fault, he claims SpaceX are still investigating the explosion that caused its Falcon 9 rocket, and the Facebook satellite it was carrying, to erupt into flames last week.…

Smart Energy GB lobbyist brushes aside infrastructure snafus The UK’s controversial smart meter programme will only succeed in saving consumers cash if people are made aware of the benefits, says Rob Smith, head of policy and public affairs at Smart Energy GB.…

Europe's biggest consumer tech company is back and wants you to wear it Interview Yesterday TomTom announced seven new consumer products (eight if you count the two SatNav units) with four fitness and three navigation products, its highest High Street profile for some years.…

Gives Ecuadorian embassy 3 stars on TripAdvisor Questions are being asked why no one has ever seen pallid, 11*-fingered WikiLeaks founder Julian Assange and NASA ‘naut Jeff Williams in the same room at the same time, after sharp-eyed observers noted the pair's startling physical resemblance.…

Yup, that's a Total Inability To Support Usual Plusnet Plusnet has been slammed by its customers for failing to acknowledge or explain the cause of a nationwide broadband service outage.…

Pre-sentence report not ready, Oxford Crown Court confirms The sentencing hearing for the Quadsys Five, who pleaded guilty in July to hacking into a rival security reseller, has been postponed as relevant paperwork remains uncompleted.…

Privacy worries bubble up after Health Sec's announcement UK health secretary Jeremy Hunt plans for NHS-approved health apps to play a role in patient records and healthcare have already spawned a rash of privacy concerns.…

Wants to make a play for smart cities and IoT Chinese telco giant ZTE has set its sights on becoming as big in the UK as its rival Huawei, the company's chief information officer Jane Chen has said.…

IOCCO annual report also reveals more than 1,000 errors and cockups More than 760,000 “items of communication” were intercepted by British spooks – and others – in 2015, according to the Interception of Communications Commissioner’s Office’s (IOCCO) annual report.…

There is no place I can hide, there is no place I can go Something for the Weekend, Sir? In the future, I will keep a vibrator in my shoes.…

It's OK, the Yanks let us play with their ships ... well, we hope Defence Secretary Michael Fallon has confirmed that the US Marine Corps will be flying F-35Bs from HMS Queen Elizabeth on the aircraft's carrier's maiden operational deployment.…

User refused to sign 'end-user licence agreement' at startup Selling a computer with pre-installed software is not an unfair commercial practice and there is no requirement to list the costs of the software, the Court of Justice of the European Union (CJEU) has ruled.…

Chipzilla's silicon acquisition spree continues with a $250m deal, claims close source Intel is in the process of acquiring Soft Machines Inc, a Santa Clara-based chip designer, according to a person familiar with the matter.…

New cyber triage to fight malware plagues NHS Digital is set to start expanding the range of cybersecurity services available to UK hospitals and clinics.…

Recent exploits and golden oldies are making packets perilous The US-CERT is warning organisations to harden their networks, because resurgent malware plus the recent publication of powerful exploits proved too hot to ignore.…

Drug discovery is benevolent business Benevolent.ai, a British artificial intelligence (AI) healthcare company, has hired IBM’s AI expert Jérôme Pesenti, ex-VP of Watson Core Technology, to head up its technology division.…

Just like in those Simpsons episodes where they travel the world, we're in Brazil. But without sucking On-Call Look at the clock: Friday is here and so, therefore, is On-Call, El Reg's weekly wander down memory lane and into readers' recollections of jobs gone awry.…

Reverse engineering reveals not-so-subtle digs at Cook and Co An examination of WhatsApp's Android chat app has found that developers are not particularly fond of Apple.…

Phlaming phablet should not be used in the sky says US Federal Aviation Administration The United States Federal Aviation Administration (FAA) has taken the unusual step of issuing a warning about Samsung's flaming phablet, the Galaxy Note 7.…

As US watchdog warns: Don't fly with one of these in your pocket Samsung's ill-fated Galaxy Note 7 is once again being blamed for causing a serious fire.…

Not a half-baked stoner movie: US aviation authorities have signed this off as a trial It sounds like the plot of a half-baked stoner movie screenplay, but it's actually happening: Google boss company Alphabet and Mexican food chain Chipotle have become the flying burrito brothers under a delivery-by-drone plan that will first target the Virginia Polytechnic Institute and State University (Virginia Tech).…

Yersinia pestis fingered as slayer of 10,000 black death victims Scientists have revealed Yersinia pestis as the bacteria that caused London's 1665 Great Plague.…