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Some things are better left without a video greeting Something for the Weekend, Sir? How did Ernest Hemingway get his scar?…

The first rule of China Club is don't blame China Netherlands-based ASML, which makes semiconductor manufacturing equipment, on Thursday insisted that it had not been the target of Chinese espionage, despite the fact that six former employees with Chinese names breached their contracts by sharing trade secrets with a competitor linked to the Chinese government.…

Techie learns the hard way there's more than one way to interpret 'make a copy' On Call Another week over, another On Call – and this one is going to provide you with a real belly-laugh.…

One step forward, one step back in space news The first attempt by a private company to land a probe on the Moon's surface ended in failure on Thursday when the vehicle crashed minutes before landing.…

Passwords, personal information can be sussed out by attackers during handshakes Researchers have detailed a set of side-channel and downgrade attacks that potentially allow an attacker to compromise Wi-Fi networks equipped with WPA3 protections.…

Lawyer for Joshua Schulte unhappy about agency review The lawyer for former CIA employee Joshua Schulte is unhappy the spy agency is allowed to review communications with her client before she receives it and has accused the agency of trying to intimidate her.…

Telemetry Interface blamed for exposed gRPC passwords Juniper Networks has issued an update after finding hardcoded credentials had been left in some of its datacenter switches.…

Sorry song fails to quell online discontent, rumors swirl of competition ahead JavaScript library manager NPM on Wednesday apologized for its handling of a contentious round of recent layoffs.…

Autonomy helped Capax Discovery repay its own contracts, he added Autonomy trial The boss of an HPE-affiliated reseller asked a barrister "what is this exactly?" when shown a copy of his own witness statement in London's High Court. Capax Discovery CEO John Baiocco then said he was "pretty sure" his HPE-funded lawyer had written it for him.…

The Lives of Others: Siri, Google and Cortana edition Sneezes and homophones – words that sound like other words – are tripping smart speakers into allowing strangers to hear recordings of your private conversations.…

Go hybrid or go home Networking overlord Cisco has punted its Application Centric Infrastructure (ACI) platform into AWS-hosted public cloud.…

Getting serious at last Analysis Samsung has shown a muscular response to the mortal threat of cheap Chinese rivals and long phone replacement cycles by packing its mid-tier phones with the exotic novelties of much pricier flagships.…

Possible 'ethical violations' found but no conflict of interest Oracle and IBM are out of the running for the Pentagon's $10bn cloud contract after a departmental probe found no evidence a conflict of interest had affected the deal.…

As Brit judge finds him guilty of breaching his bail conditions One-time Aussie cupboard-dweller Julian Assange has been charged with conspiracy to commit computer intrusion by the US government.…

Sophos, Avast users left wailing as update borks older OSes A bunch of PCs running the wares of Sophos or Avast have been freezing or failing to start following the installation of patches emitted by Microsoft on 9 April.…

Samsung's still king and memory still hottest item, despite unstable pricing Sales growth at the world's chipmakers stalled in 2018 following protracted struggles with DRAM oversupply.…

Insiders play 'Where's 19H2?' and every day is an Edge day Fast Ringers keen to extricate themselves from the Windows Insider programme have missed their chance for a quieter life as Microsoft booted them into the 2020s with build 18875.…

Homo luzonensis spotted underneath layers and layers of clay in a Filipino cave A team of archeologists has pieced together bone fragments to reveal what is, apparently, a new species of human.…

Judge can't believe IBM, with its Watson AI, needs help finding out about its own documents The judge hearing an age discrimination claim against IBM in Texas on Wednesday issued a withering denial of the company's motion to unmask the source of internal documents at the center of plaintiff Jonathan Langley's case.…

Down in EMEA, US, Latin America, APAC. Aw bless... Top 3 vendors profited from small fry's pain, though The Intel CPU supply constraints came home to roost in calendar Q1 as global PC sales shrank: only the top three largest manufacturers reported any growth after they muscled to source as many chips as they could.…

All 11 fingers* cuffed as Ecuador strips WikiLeaks founder of political Assange, er asylum Julian Assange has been arrested by London cops at the Ecuadorian Embassy after the nation revoked the asylum it had given him for near on seven years.…

Retrofitting Apple pricing to a bygone era A piece of UK computing history is going on the auction block this month in the form of a plug-in package for a Ferranti Pegasus Computer.…

Chipzilla kicks out firmware patches for Spoiler, three others Intel has posted another round of firmware updates with fixes for four CVE-listed vulnerabilities.…

Turning data into insight Sponsored webcast The volume of data many organisations have to deal with today is vast, and it can prive troublesome to interpret. Traditional analytics approaches can be piecemeal, restrictive, non-economical and inflexible.…

New bill grants the FTC powers to investigate companies US senators introduced a bill on Wednesday that will allow the Federal Trade Commission to inspect if corporations are using algorithms that are biased, discriminatory, and insecure.…

Norks trigger Uncle Sam's alarm with attack variant The Lazarus Group hacking operation, thought to be controlled by the North Korean government, has a new malware toy to pitch at potential targets and the US is getting worried about it.…

News only spoiled by fact it was a complete waste of time US lawmakers approved a net neutrality bill on Wednesday that would repeal the repeal of rules that would force ISPs to treat all internet content equally.…

Google Cloud product deluge spans security, analytics and AI People with suitably modern Android phones can now use their handsets as a hardware security key to safeguard both their Google Accounts and Google Cloud accounts.…

That's almost a hundred BEEEELLION dollarydoos Semiconductor sales by Chinese manufacturers are said to have reached ¥653.2bn in 2018 – that's about $97.3bn, or around 20 per cent of global semiconductor revenue for the year ($476.7bn).…

Fresh round of targeted operations unearthed Kaspersky Lab has revealed a pair of attacks targeting governments and political groups in Asia and the Middle East.…

Funny, that An American company is to build a series of undersea cables linking Australia to China after the Aussie government put its foot down and kicked Huawei off the contract.…

Presidential 2020 ad nicks Dark Knight Rises soundtrack A video for President Trump's 2020 re-election campaign has been pulled offline for copyright infringement.…

Almost as much as 4th biggest mobe maker made in 2018 Xiaomi's founder and CEO has received 636.6 million company shares valued at more than £735m – not far off the adjusted net profit figure the fast-rising Chinese mobe maker banked for 2018.…

Nah, it's just an old photo, claims spokesborg Salesforce's towering glass phallus in San Francisco has been omitted from the Oracle Park calendar on sale at the first SF Giants baseball game under the stadium's new Big Red moniker.…

But adds just one new module, and even that is more of a transplant The latest OpenStack release is out in the wilds. Codenamed Stein, the platform update is said to allow for much faster Kubernetes deployments, new IP and bandwidth management features, and introduces a software module focused on cloud resource management – Placement.…

I'm sure I'll manage, rules Mr Justice Fraser A High Court judge has said he is not biased against the Post Office as part of a long-running trial over the privatised network's infamous Horizon computer system.…

Opt-out? We can just tie a carrier bag over the cam – it doesn't have a stop button A TV production company has been fined £120,000 after it set up cameras in a maternity clinic for a documentary on stillbirths, but tragically didn't get patients' advance permission for filming.…

Gumstick card for notebooks Intel has combined its Optane 3D XPoint memory with up to a terabyte of QLC flash to provide a responsive, high-capacity gumstick card for lappies.…

Sadly, USS Cygnus still missing Boffins have battled cries of "but it looks like an onion ring" to show off the first direct visual evidence of a supermassive black hole and its shadow.…

Also promises to tell users that they are the product... like many of you didn't already know Facebook will alter its AI so it doesn't poke you to invite your dead friends to parties. For those still in the land of the living, the data slurping biz has also agreed to tweak its Ts&Cs so members know their personal information is the source of the creepy corp's income.…

Software provider tackles growing market sector Promo Enterprise mobility management software provider Jamf is staging its biggest Jamf Nation Roadshow at Tobacco Docklands venue, near Canary Wharf, on 17th May.…

Plus: A year ago today El Reg changed the law Aria Technology has been denied permission to appeal against a tax court's ruling that the PC and components dealer diddled HMRC out of £750,000 of VAT through a VAT carousel fraud.…

Welcome to Day One of the post NT 5.1 era Windows XP has finally reached the end of the road, as the last supported variant - POSReady 2009 - is supported no more.…

Still, at least it didn't smear sh!t all over the floor this time Busting down a stricken woman's bathroom door, guns at the ready, Oregon's finest expected to encounter a dangerous intruder. Instead they found a bungling Roomba Robot Vacuum giving the loo a once-over.…

If you're feeling a little bit Linux, p-p-p-pick up a p-p-p-Pengwin...1.2 There was good news this week for the Venn region of Windows 10 users who also enjoy a bit of Linux bothering on the desktop, as Pengwin 1.2 popped up on the Microsoft Store.…

Making it the first new top-level project since 2012 Kata Containers, the open-source effort to marry the speed of application containers with security features of virtual machines, has become the first ever top-level project to be accepted by the OpenStack Foundation (OSF) – besides its cloud platform, of course.…

At least it's not a two-week long outage this time Exclusive King's College London has suffered an IT worry but this time not of its own making – yesterday it warned staff and students that some accounts have been "compromised" due to an apparent brute-force attack on password systems.…

Software vendors report UK VAT API returning spurious data, confusing users Software vendors have complained that a crucial API that went live last week as part of HMRC's Making Tax Digital (MTD) reforms is returning spurious data – and that the taxman is blaming them.…

Tech lawyer argues that 'give us all your data or your kit gets it' doesn't count as valid consent Sonos stands accused of seeking to obtain "excessive" amounts of personal data without valid consent in a complaint filed with the UK's data watchdog.…

Finding a twin brown dwarfs around a giant star just adds to the confusion The discovery of two oddball brown dwarfs orbiting a giant orange star has reignited the question of whether brown dwarfs are feeble stars or bloated planets.…