The Onion
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| Updated | 2025-11-08 11:47 |
by Ryan Shattuck on Local, shared by Ryan Shattuck to on (#3BMEQ)
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by Ryan Shattuck on (#3BFK8)
Twitter began banning violent or abusive user accounts this week, including several notable white supremacists and leaders of the far-right. What do you think?Read more...
by Ryan Shattuck on Local, shared by Ryan Shattuck to on (#3BFK9)
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by Ryan Shattuck on Local, shared by Ryan Shattuck to on (#3BFKA)
NORWICH, CT—Saying he might very well be the one, area woman Bethany Han told reporters Friday that she could imagine spending her whole life in uncomfortable silence with the man she was currently on a first date with. “I know we just met, but there’s something about Bill that makes me feel like I could awkwardly sit…Read more...
by Ryan Shattuck on Local, shared by Ryan Shattuck to on (#3BFKB)
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by Ryan Shattuck on Local, shared by Ryan Shattuck to on (#3BFKC)
HAVERHILL, MA—Doing his best to mask his disappointment that the package didn’t contain the cable-knit cashmere sweater he’d had his heart set on, local child Max Campbell reportedly spared his uncle’s feelings Friday by pretending to like the Xbox One X he received as a gift. “Thanks, Uncle Joe, I’ll definitely get a…Read more...
by Ryan Shattuck on (#3BFKD)
According to a list compiled from leaked user data, this year’s most popular passwords include several perennial favorites such as “football,†as well as new passwords such as “starwars†and “iloveyouâ€. What do you think?Read more...
by Ryan Shattuck on (#3BFKE)
NEW YORK—Citing the limited household budgets of many young married couples, a new report published Friday estimates that more Americans than ever this Christmas will be forced to sell a gold watch inherited from their father in order to buy a set of fine combs for their wife’s beautiful hair. “Wages have remained…Read more...
by Ryan Shattuck on (#3BFKF)
In a breakthrough in biomedicine, the FDA has approved a gene therapy for inherited blindness. What do you think?Read more...